RUdiGer, Tomas Und Andreas are now legends within communitariat, but their story has more surprising origins than you may think. This is how they discovered the religion of Schweinekult and founded feasterbüsh
RUdiGer, Tomas Und Andreas was once simple pigkinder from the small town of LudlowenstauserBergerstein in the german countryside. Two were Holzdoktors, the other a Kuchenmacher.
A scabby witch visited them and said they must quest to the Fleischwald magical woods over the moutains of Bierberg.
At the mouth of the cave of fleischig, they battled the great evil dragon Veganismus. For 7 days they fought until RUDiger brought his Schweineaxt down into the beast's brain.
they journeyed for months with a fairy and the yodelling Kaninchen Stephan, through perilous Tollwut-Tal and Gemüsetal.
Both Stephan and the fairy died of consumption.
Into the tomb of Apfelsoße they ventured, deep through its hallowed halls until they found a vast temple glowing with golden light.
There they met the golden god pig, Wurstgott, who gave them a holy mission and this commandment:
"Trinken Sie gutes Bier, treiben Sie Sport und lassen Sie keine Schäbchen herein"
Since then, they've brought their sacred calling to 1980s berlin where thousands of Muskelschweine gather every two years to celebrate Schweinefleisch essen, Bierkonsum und Fußballspielen.